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Tuesday, November 28th, 2006
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I have a new phone so.....if you want me to have your number IM me or leave a comment. Thanks. btw my number is the same.
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, September 28th, 2006
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I'm really angry. So be forewarned. I'm tired of Christians that act like they are better than anyone else. I'm tired of people acting like everything is cool. You know exactly who I am talking about. People that act like nothing is wrong in their life when deep inside they know they are living a lie.
I'm not perfect. So dont think I'm not pointing the finger at myself. I need to change as well.
I'm also tired of LBC being nothing more that match.com Sure we all laugh when people say Lancaster Bridal College, but in all seriousness, if you are in a relationship just to prove to everyone that you somehow have your life together, you are wrong. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe I'm not seeing things correctly. Maybe we should be at a Bible college to learn about God. I'm dead set on the fact that if we focused more on God then we wouldnt care about who we were dating this week. Its disgusting, plain and simple. How are we supposed to be different than this world if all we ever do is try to blend in.
Like I said maybe I have it all wrong. Maybe I should just shut up and let people make mistakes and find out for themselves. Maybe I should just let people live in their little LBC bubble.
I'm not attacking people that are trying to fall in love. Believe me I want it more than anyone. I'm just trying to understand how people can live day to day knowing they have left things unfinished. I'm no longer going to pretend everything is ok, I'm no longer going to act like past relationships went well just so people think I'm a cool person. I'm tired of being a surfacy Christian, I'm tired of letting people get to me.
I'm tired of living a lie.
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How deep the Father's love for us
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
And make a wretch His treasure
How great the pain of searing loss
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the Chosen One
Bring many sons to glory
Behold the man upon his cross
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice
Call out among the scoffers
It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished
I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection
Why should I gain from His reward
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom
Why should I gain from His reward
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom
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Friday, October 14th, 2005
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i have 2 ticketes to this show one for me and one for............
Thousand Foot Krutch Concert Details:
Thousand Foot Krutch, w/ Hawk Nelson, Dizmas and Fourth Avenue Jones
October 16, 2005 @ 6:00pm 
Eastern University • St. Davids, PA
call me!!
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Wednesday, August 17th, 2005
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Thursday, July 28th, 2005
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ok so here's a story. the long version so if anyone missed anything now is your chance to get all you questions answered.
I start off with a question. Have you ever been around someone or with someone and thought, wow I could spend the rest of my life with this person? Dont answer to quickly because its not an easily answered question. Is there someone out there who is your perfect match? Did God create someone that is my match? I believe He did. I think that somewehere out there, there is a person for everyone. You just have to be in the right mind frame sometimes to acctually see that person. What is the right mind frame? Glad you asked. For me it was giving everything to God, trusting my future with Him. It sounds easier than it really is, and trust me it was the hardest thing to do. So after doing this i naturally thought it would be an instantanious thing. I would pray like 3 times tops and some girl would show up at my door. I wish that it would have been that easy but I know in the long run that I'm glad it wasn't. I prayed for years for this. To find someone that not only made me happy but honestly makes my soul happy. I had all but given up hope. I was starting to believe myself that maybe there wasnt a person out there for me. Maybe God wanted me to be single, and I was cool with that.
Then came december 04. A christmas concert at LBC. My sister works there and I was invited to go to the concert. Afterwards everyone came back to (now my apartment as well) my sister apartment. There I met some of my sisters friends, they either worked at LBC or went to school there. One person stuck out in my mind and, I didnt realize it at the time, but this would be the girl i fell head over heals for. The months pass and not much happens. I go through a time where i think I'm in love. And then find out that I'm wrong. Then i begin to convince myself I dont need love.
Then comes the youth group. I move to lancaster, work for a church and (now) run the youth group. I throw myself into everything I do. Filling my mind with the word of God, and basically giving everything to Him. Then someone returns. A person whom I had met only once. A person who has changed her major from music to youth min. and she wants to help out with my youth group. She shows up at a superbowl party, and i dont pay much attention to her. Not that I'm rude I just wast giving myself a chance to know her.
Then comes chicago. A missions trip that almost didnt happen. An event that changed my life forever. This girl decides to go as a chaperon. Fair enough we need a female on the trip, and i thought nothing more. As the week prgressed, i found myself opening up to her. Just talking to her, and really goofing off. Just having fun. And as the week ended I knew that are time together was growing ever shorter.
Then saturday came. The trip was over and I took her to the house she was staying. Even then I didnt know how my heart was going to change for her. The plans were made to go to a movie that night. The teens in the van all yelled and screamed "Go Go, you have to GO!" I almost didnt. But I did. I went to see "must love dogs" with this girl and her best friend. During parts of the movie we laughed and looked at each other when certain jokes were made on screen that reminded us of things that had happened during the week. Even then I didnt know what was happening.
Then came the look. After the movie we started talking about John Cusack. You see this girl hadnt seen High Fidelity before and it just so happened to be my favorite movie. So we headed back to my apartment. Where we soon found oursleves on the couch. And to my surprise sharing a pillow. Then during the movie i looked up. I saw this girl peering over the pillow, right into my eyes. The look that stole this boys heart. The look that has forever changed my life.
Then came the talking. We talked, and talked , and talked. For six hours. Saying things that I had never told anyone before. Reading poetry that only I have read. And feeling something that was much more than just temporary. A feeling that has changed me like nothing else before. (except God but i figured you got that already)
Then came the rules. You see this girl had been hurt before, but then again so had this boy. The rules of the relationship. Some might say they are crazy. Some might laugh and say good luck keeping those rules. But I hope that most will say wow this boy is dedicated. This is for real. What are the rules you ask. Well first off I would have to ask this girls parents if i could date her. (still havent met them yet!) Second she didnt want to kiss until she gets married. (long story beind this one) Third, the two wouldnt be able to date until they ahd know each other for a year, until then they would just befriends. (how far away is december) and forth I couldnt break her heart.
That leaves me with one thing to say. I'm willing to do anything to make this realtionship work. I will go to any lengths to make this girl happy, to be with her forever. I only have one rule though.
Dont break my heart.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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| Time: | 3:44 am. |
| Music: | sleep is all the music i need. |
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From now on my screen name will be
LancYouthGuy
arawk is gone upwardsdownfall is gone :(
so if you want to im me use LancYouthGuy
email will still be the same
arawk@hotmail.com
and my journal and myspace will still be the same
peace
ps my* laptop is in the office!!!!! (i hope)
*my refers to the laptop the church is buying but i can use anytime but sunday morning, thus becoming my laptop.
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Thursday, June 23rd, 2005
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p i n k m o c h i says 唯一の友人!!! (friends only)
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i was talking to my friend i used to work with at target. and she told me that her dad had just died. i think it was last week. i never met him but i worked withe sherri for 3 years. she's like a sister to me. i only posted this so you could just say a prayer for her, and her family.
thanks
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| Time: | 12:11 pm. |
| Mood: |  cold. | | Music: | Something Corporate - I wanna Save You. |
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So there are rumors that Mitch didnt die. I'm not really to sure about that. His comedy isn't the type that he would fake his death as a joke. Here is a like with one of my favorite jokes. It's at the improv from like 2003. Enjoy
Mitch live
ps I'm going home today. the cell is one. Happy Birthday dad!
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, March 31st, 2005
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Tuesday, February 8th, 2005
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Tuesday, January 18th, 2005
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| Time: | 3:51 pm. |
| Mood: |  contemplative. | | Music: | Coldplay -- Don't Panic Garden State Soundtrack mmmmm. |
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I know all of you have been waiting by your LJ just to hear my "BIB BIG News" so, I figured I'd let all of you (those who don't already know)in.
As of Monday night I am officially one of 3 of the youth pastors at 1st Baptist Church of Lancaster. From what I hear it was a unanimous vote. I'm going to be the events coordinator as well as everything else they need me to be. It's a job that I wasn't sure I wanted until I really prayed about it. I need a job and thou it only pays in rent,electric,heat,water,Internet,and soon digital cable/. It's still pays rent, electric..... you get the point.
So now I'm at the task of emptying my room. Things are going and boxes and things that should have been thrown away days/weeks/months/years ago are doing such.
And thus ends my big news. Sorry if any of you thought I was going to run for president or something. (that announcement will come later) As for when I'm gong to move is another question. My dad has a meeting in philly on Thursday and is (depending on weather) going to be leaving for Florida on Sunday for "work" I say it like that because its 13 degrees here and I know it has to be warmer than that in Florida so work can't seem that bad. But I would like to get some stuff over there this week because Saturday the youth group is going to a Hershey bears game, and I might stay this weekend as long as I can get some stuff over there tm or friday.
Well I've said enough. I would like everyone to comment about things they will miss about my room. And ladies feel free to comment about all the good times*I'm not sure how much longer I will have AOL. So the screen name will be the same and email as well. I have a hotmail account but I wont use it till I move.
Peace
*there were no "ladies" or "good times"
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, December 30th, 2004
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Friday, December 3rd, 2004
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| Time: | 5:17 am. |
| Mood: |  sleepy. |
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Royals game tonight 7pm. I have 2 tickets. I'm going so that means I will have one extra. Any takers?
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Monday, November 8th, 2004
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Let me guess, you picked out yet another colorful box with a crank that I'm expected to turn and turn until OOP! big shock, a jack pops out and you laugh and the kids laugh and the dog laughs and I die a little inside.
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Monday, November 1st, 2004
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| Time: | 9:28 pm. |
| Mood: |  creative. |
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Vote tomorrow! Vote for life! Vote for Bush!
need i say more?
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Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.
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Friday, October 8th, 2004
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| Time: | 2:50 am. |
| Mood: |  sad. | | Music: | Run - Snow Patrol. |
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I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done.
And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here
Light up, Light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
Louder, louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say
To think I might not see those eyes
It makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbyes
I nearly do.
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
Louder, louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say
Slower, slower
We don't have time for that
All I want is to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads
Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess.
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear.
I don't know I was listening to this song on the way home tonight and it just kinda hit me. Laura's new guy friend is going to freakin kosovo. And he's just starting this new relationship and he's going to be gone for 18 months. With nothing more of maybe a picture and a few letters down the road. Not to mention the fact of daily fears because of being over there. It's really sad. You don't fully comprehend this until you know someone in the war or love someone far away. My friend is in Afghanistan for 2 years. And if I could I would be over there as well. So read the lyrics get the song from snow patrol and think about things. About all the people across the sea right now fighting for your freedom.
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arawk's journal
